I’ve been mulling over minutiae to figure out how to best share my thoughts. Turns out it was easy. Im kind of a weird dude. My family is tolerant of this. And I suppose weird+#borngeek=weird geek. Took me 30 years to figure that one out. Now I celebrate the geek in me. It is who I am.
Right, valleys. Follow me, for just one, moderately confusing thought. Imagine your brain in all its slimy, fatty, watery glory. Now without complicating my explanation further, imagine that photo as some part of its topography. Let’s use a daily activity–tying your shoes. This “valley” in your mind has likely been a twice daily”visited valley from age 5. You’ve been there. You have done the sightseeing, tabernac. This is a valley in my my mind often visited.
MS changes the landscape, the very topographical structure of the brain. Those valleys are still there. Just like anyone. There is a valley for tying your shoes. There is one for using the washroom, one for dressing yourself, another for meal prep. So think of these valleys, frequently visited, and intimatrly known to me. And then the ground sarts to tremble. Half the valleys flood with debris. The ground shifts.
#myms caused something of a 7 year earthquake. And just like any post disaster recovery, well, I’ve got to work to get those valleys free of debris. Im now focused on the valley in my my mind not visited since 2008 (walking). I’ll be sure to see valleys are shifted only, and not caved in. With fhat in mind, I just full of rubble. The valleys I spent a lifetime developing are intact. I just need to clear the rubble with the aid and assistance of a physical therapist.
So remember that every warm wish, every “I hope yoi get better” was just one more flashlight pointed into this trracherously deep valley in my mind. I crawled put alive. And I am better for it.